Deep thoughts....

[SunTzu]

I loved my old job when I could hide in my
cubicle and spend the day farting around.
Instead it's just work, work, work here
at the baked bean methane-research lab.

Rest area, rest home -- what difference does
it make? I'm sure Grandma enjoyed seeing
all those big trucks pulling in and out.

Sure, I felt stupid, but I was also mighty
relieved when my doctor told me the burning
sensation I was experiencing while urinating
was due to standing too close to the campfire.

[imported_trio]

is this like Deep Thoughts on SNL [img]/LDPforum/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[Seventy4]

By Jack Handey?

[SunTzu]

I think a couple of those may be Handey's . Here's a couple more

When I awoke in the middle of the night to the
scratching on my closet door, it brought back my
old fear of monsters lurking in the dark. Then
I realized it was just the kids trying to get out.

I nearly ran over a turtle today. I hate
it when they dart out in traffic like that.